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27 votes
27 votes
Which is the best way to revise this sentence for clarity and brevity?

Although others have described New York City as exhilarating because of its culture and culinary delights, I found the metropolis to be awash in detritus, while also offensive to the olfactory sense.

New York is very exciting to many people, but I found it boring.

I don’t know why people love New York so much. I don’t like it.

Some people love New York, but I found it to be dirty and smelly.

New York City is not worth visiting because it smells bad.

User Useless Intern
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2.6k points

2 Answers

22 votes
22 votes

Answer:

Some people love New York, but I found it to be dirty and smelly.

Step-by-step explanation:

This sentence describes why others like New York and why the speaker does not like New York, so any revisions should keep the basic idea of the sentence. Removing some of the details and any complex or long words can make the sentence easier for listeners to process and understand.

User Sethobrien
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3.3k points
7 votes
7 votes

Answer:

Some people love New York, but I found it to be dirty and smelly.

Step-by-step explanation:

took the test and got it right

User ThunderWiring
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3.1k points