523,243 views
8 votes
8 votes
Can someone help me with my essay?

Details: it’s an opinion writing, and I chose my opinion to be Disneyland is the best place to go for a holiday.

Here is what I have so far:



In my opinion, Disneyland is the best place to go for a holiday. I have 3 reasons for this, and to support my opinion, I wrote 3 paragraphs including the 3 reasons and details. My goal is for you to agree with my opinion, so I hope you enjoy my writing. You may not agree with my opinion on “Disneyland is the best place to go for a holiday”, but I’m willing to give it an attempt. Now lets begin!



2 A reason why I believe Disneyland is the best place to go for a holiday is because of all the fun activities you can experience. Like the Disney’s Animal Kingdom Theme park.



3. My second reason for why you should go to Disneyland for your next holiday is the great service.






4. You’re close to the end! My final reason is because of the fascinating attractions and stores.






5. In conclusion Disneyland is the best place to go for a holiday.

(NOT ADDING A LOT OF POINTS SINCE SOMEONE STOLE MY POINTS WITHOUT HELPING BEFORE

User Steven Spungin
by
2.5k points

2 Answers

9 votes
9 votes
this is a great start but add more detail, for example: You should go to Disneyland for your next holiday because of the great service. All the employees are super nice and the characters are super friendly. (**elaborate**)
User Kartik Pandya
by
2.7k points
14 votes
14 votes
To start off the essay, begin with a sentence started or a question, something to hook in the reader.

Ex.: Disneyland! The one and only, truly amusing vacation spot for families and friends of all ages! Don’t believe me? etc, etc.

When starting paragraphs, be sure to alternate between different sentence starters as well. Feel free to search some up for help, there are plenty of resources out there.


Make sure to add on to your reasons, and kind of extend it until you feel like you’ve reached everywhere on that certain topic.

Ex.: Topic = Great service
Paragraph = Ranting about the good service

(you can always edit it later!!)

Trying to make this short, when it comes to the conclusion be sure to not end it too dry, make it kind of like you are advertising it? Add quotes? Anything that you think would close it and end it well, maybe even restating the opinions you have reached in the introduction but in different wording to make it easier

(i hope this helped u at least a little!))
User Ramesh Sangili
by
2.8k points