I remember that day was a day of somber, it was quiet and filled with shadows. I didn't know it yet, but, the death of my nephew would provoke such a trauma in my internal brain systems that I would end up with much rage and sadness over his death. After his death, I would not be the same. And, till now I am still not the same. It is not easy to live with a life filled with voices that speak to you within nor mind, nor is it enthusiastic to see shadows appear and disappear before you, its a jaded feeling that is hard to suppress.
That day when I was in the hospital, my nephew drew his last breaths. His signals were slowly fading, and, my eyes teared up. I knew, I couldn't live without my loving Alessandro, he was the last thing in my life that kept me going. Even in bad times, he was there to comfort and console me. Out of us both he was the most mature because he was the oldest, he was like my older brother. How could I be so farcical when we were little? I repent of the times I denied him a hug and a kiss, I repent it much.
Now, he is gone. As I sat in the hospital chair and realized the fact, I cried. I cried so much. I hated myself for not being there when he needed me the most. I avoided any surreptitiously attention to myself and I left the room, I wept in silence. No one knew how much lament was inside me, but, I knew well how much hurt was deep inside of me. I lost Alessandro, no one could return to me what I had lost except Jehovah God.