Question

Jessie returned from the locker room after football practice and found that his new shoes were missing from his locker. One of his teammates,

Steve, had been checking the shoes out before practice. Jessie approached Steve to ask him about the shoes. Steve got really angry and tried

to push past Jessie and leave the locker room. Jessie grabbed him to stop him from leaving. Steve pushed him away again and they started

shoving each other. The coach separated them and sent them to the office for peer mediation. How would you lead Jessie and Steve through

this difficult situation using the 4Ds of a Difficult Conversation (Define, Defuse, Discuss, and Decide)? Write a three-to-five-sentence summary

of the discussion

Answer 1

This problematic situation should be resolved by using the 4 Ds of a difficult conversation (Define, Defuse, Discuss, and Decide).

First, we would need to "define" the problem. At this stage, Jessie would have to explain the situation to the mediator, explain why he suspected Steve, and tell all the details about the confrontation. In the stage known as "defuse," we would have to try to calm both participants down. This would most likely be done through calm conversations and the use of reason. After, we would enter the stage of "discuss." This stage would require us to talk things over, confront the problem, and brainstorm ideas. Finally, in the stage known as "decide" we would need to definitely establish what happened and what actions we can take to solve the problem.