The fallacy of helplessness enables people to believe that their lives are not under their control. People who believe in this idea think that external factors are the reason why their lives are better or worse.
We can sometimes mistakenly believe that this applies to our relationships. For example, many people believe in the idea of soulmates. People who believe this usually think that finding a partner is not under their control, but that external forces might or might not allow it to occur.
A way to change this way of thinking is by being proactive when it comes to establishing the relationships that we desire. For example, if we want to have a romantic partner, we can make decisions such as signing up for online dating or joining more social clubs. This will help us take control of our own relationships.