Question

Read the excerpt from a student's essay. Putting on a bike helmet is the most important part of preparing for a bicycle ride. Helmets protect the brain and neck. They have been proven to reduce injuries by over 50 percent. It is important that helmets fit properly and that fasteners work correctly. I wear a helmet with a spider-web design.

Answer 1

A good way to revise this is to really think about how you are writing first you put in randomly that you have a helmet with a spider web design and then later you mention that they are the most effective first they are sentences apart they should be together and you need to give examples on how they are the most effective you also say that helmets have cause accident and are dangerous give a deeper explanation of that.

Answer 2

A good way to revise this is to really think about how you are writing first you put in radomly that you have a helemet with a spider web design and then later you mention that they are the most effective first they are sentences apart they should be toghther and you need to give examples on how they are the most effective you also say that helmets have cause accident and are dangerous give a deeper explination of that

Step-by-step explanation: