96,418 views
24 votes
24 votes
Someone help me I wrote a poem and can someone tell me something I should add or edit

I recall a moment when I was once scared of the ocean at night
Frightened of what may be there since there was no sight
I seemed to ask myself why am I afraid? The water was not deep
What am I afraid of ? I took a few steps in and stopped I couldn’t keep going
I felt the shells and with the fear of sea creatures so I got out right away
I was too scared that I was thinking in my head “maybe tomorrow but not today”
Feared the water
Feared the darkness
Feared the creatures
Feared dying
Someone once said “If you don't do wild things while you're young, You'll have nothing to smile about when you're old” and I took that risk and don’t regret it

User Ian Davis
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1 Answer

21 votes
21 votes
Its good how it is .
User Mamills
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2.8k points