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4 votes
Read the sentence.

You have to agree that paving over that muddy, gross area where we wait before school is a good idea.

Which revision makes the tone of the sentence appropriate for a formal e-mail?

Please review our suggestion for paving over the muddy area where students wait before school.
You know, you should consider paving over the area where we wait before school because it’s gross.
Please note our awesome suggestion for paving over the gross area where we wait before school.
Paving over that muddy area where students wait before school is obviously a smart plan.

User Lasonya
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1 Answer

2 votes

Answer: Please review our suggestion for paving over the muddy area where students wait before school.

Explanation: The revision mentioned above makes the sentence's tone appropriate for a from e-mail. The sentence's tone sounds polite and professional at the same time. As the mail is being sent to an authority (understood from the first look of the question given), it should be neat, polite, and have a professional or formal touch and it should not have a commanding tone. The mail would look more convincing and considerable if you can add convincing words like please, requesting, may, etc.

User Niels Steenbeek
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8.0k points