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Read this paragraph from a student's short story.

Jerrica
looked into the mirror. She took a deep breath. Today she would audition for the role of her dreams. She had wanted to play
Clara in Porgy and Bess. Her grandmother once sang "Summertime" as a lullaby to Jerrica and her sisters. Now Jerrica would have the
chance
1. Complete the first sentence with a relative clause. Have fun with the clause you add-it's okay to add new details to the
story!
2. Combine the fourth and fifth sentences into a single sentence. To do that, revise one of the sentences so that it is an adverb
clause.
4
3. Explain how each clause you added affects the story.

1 Answer

5 votes

Jerrica, who had practiced for hours every day, looked into the mirror.

In this sentence, a relative clause is added to provide more information about Jerrica. The clause "who had practiced for hours every day" adds detail about Jerrica's dedication and preparation for the audition. It reinforces her commitment to the role and enhances the reader's understanding of her character.

Having wanted to play Clara in Porgy and Bess, which her grandmother once sang "Summertime" as a lullaby to Jerrica and her sisters, Jerrica now had the chance.

In this revised sentence, the fourth sentence is transformed into an adverb clause ("Having wanted to play Clara in Porgy and Bess"). By modifying the main clause, it adds a causal relationship between Jerrica's desire to play Clara and the influence of her grandmother's lullaby. It suggests that Jerrica's personal connection with the song and her grandmother's singing inspired her aspiration to perform the role.

The added relative clause in the first sentence emphasizes Jerrica's dedication and hard work, enhancing the reader's perception of her as a committed and passionate individual.

The transformed sentence in question 2, with an adverb clause, establishes a link between Jerrica's desire to play Clara and her grandmother's lullaby. This connection deepens the emotional significance of the role for Jerrica and highlights the personal and familial influences that contribute to her dream.

Overall, the added clauses provide additional context and emotional depth to Jerrica's character, strengthening the reader's engagement with her aspirations and motivations.

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