Question

When an author introduces a new character in a short story, he or she must quickly establish the character's key traits. In this portion of the narrative, the author misses an opportunity to develop Mr. Valentine. Rewrite this section of the story to better establish Mr. Valentine as a complex character.

Promptly at 8:00 a.m., the doorbell rang. Letting out another deep sigh, Paul pulled himself up off the couch and walked to the door. Opening it, he discovered a small, shriveled, white-haired man staring up at him with piercing blue eyes.

"Mr. Candor?" the man said in a voice that was much larger than he was.

"Uh, no, sir. My father isn't home right now. I can give you his work number if you'd like to call him," replied Paul.

"Mr. Paul Candor is who I'm looking for," said the man. "Is that you?"

"Oh, yes, sir. That's me. You must be my tutor," said Paul, in a voice that didn't hide his skepticism.

"Yes, I'm Mr. Valentine. Let's get to work."

Paul welcomed Mr. Valentine into the house and they sat at the kitchen table and began to work.

Answer 1

Step-by-step explanation:

Promptly at 8:00 a.m., the doorbell rang. Paul groaned, knowing it was his new tutor arriving on time. He dragged himself off the couch, his thoughts consumed by the unfairness of his parents hiring someone to improve his grades. He opened the door and was surprised to find a small, shriveled, white-haired man staring up at him with piercing blue eyes.

"Mr. Candor?" the man boomed, his voice belying his diminutive size.

"Uh, yes," Paul answered, taken aback by the man's powerful presence.

The man stepped inside and looked around the living room. "I see you're not quite ready for me. That's fine. We have plenty of time."

Paul raised an eyebrow. He had expected his tutor to be stuffy and strict, not understanding and patient. "Can I get you something to drink?" he offered, wanting to test the waters.

The man smiled warmly. "That's very kind of you, Mr. Candor. I'll have a glass of water if you don't mind."

As Paul fetched the water, he couldn't help but wonder what kind of person his tutor really was. The man's booming voice and piercing eyes suggested he was confident and assertive, but his easy demeanor hinted at something more complex. Paul couldn't wait to find out.