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How to structure a meeting to have a difficult conversation around a history of toxic behavior?

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Final answer:

To have a structured and constructive meeting on toxic behavior, set clear objectives and a respectful tone, create communication ground rules, use non-confrontational language, and focus on specific behaviors. Both parties should engage in active listening and mutually express thoughts and feelings. The meeting should conclude with actionable steps for improvement.

Step-by-step explanation:

To structure a meeting for discussing toxic behavior, consider these steps:

  • Set clear objectives for the meeting, emphasizing the goal of a productive conversation.
  • Begin by setting a respectful tone and openly stating the purpose of the discussion.
  • Establish ground rules for communication, ensuring that both parties take turns speaking and listening.
  • Focus on specific behaviors rather than labeling individuals, and use non-confrontational language.
  • Ask open-ended questions that encourage explanation rather than defensiveness (e.g., 'Can you explain to me what motivated you to say that in the meeting?').
  • Express your feelings and thoughts clearly, and invite the other party to do the same, fostering mutual understanding.
  • Reaffirm what you've heard to show you are actively listening and to clarify any misunderstandings.
  • Be prepared to learn from each other, aiming to transform an emotional situation into a learning opportunity.
  • End the meeting with actionable steps to address the concerns and improve the relationship.

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