Question

Is the essay I have below looks good, if possible please check for proper puncuations ,grammar and capitilization, next if possible please show me the proper way to essay I have below, for each parapragh if possible to add one or two more sentences for each of the three paragraphs. Please look at the attached rubrics below then read and look carefully.

Note: If possible show me a proper way to write the thesis and concluding sentence?

Next Note: Look at the not just hollywood reading snapshop and look at paragraph 6 only because the whole essay is related to that paragraph?

Finally look at the snapshot of the essay outline carefully which are attached.


Thesis Statement
McLaren’s assertion that women have been complicit in the sexism that has riddled their lives is a fair comment.

Paragraph 1:
In the face of societal pressures, women are often discouraged from voicing their experiences with sexism leading to a culture of silence and acceptance. Societal Pressures. Women often face societal issues to conform and not cause trouble, which can discourage them from speaking out against sexism

Paragraph 2:
The societal pressure for women to conform their norms of agreeability and non-confrontation often silences their voices against sexism. Norms and Expectations. The societal norms and expectations that women should be agreeable and not confrontational can also contribute to their science.

Paragraph 3:

The silence of women in the face of sexism can inadvertently perpetuate the very discrimination they endure. Perpetuation of sexism. By not speaking out against sexism, women can indirectly contribute to its perpetuation.

Conclusion sentence:
In conclusion, it is crucial to acknowledge the societal pressures and norms that often discourage women from speaking out against sexism, it is equally important to recognize the inadvertent role they may play in its perpetuation.

Answer 1

The essay has room for improvement in terms of punctuation, grammar, and capitalization. Each paragraph can be expanded with more sentences for clarity and supporting examples. The thesis and concluding sentence can be refined to better reflect the essay's content.

Step-by-step explanation:

Introduction

The introduction should include the author, title of the work, publication date, historical context, and a brief summary. Additionally, it should clearly state the thesis or main claim. In this case, the thesis statement is: "McLaren’s assertion that women have been complicit in the sexism that has riddled their lives is a fair comment."

Paragraph 1

This paragraph addresses the societal pressures that discourage women from speaking out against sexism. To improve the paragraph, you can add a couple of more sentences to provide examples or further explain the concept of societal pressures.

Paragraph 2

This paragraph discusses the societal norms and expectations women face that silence their voices against sexism. Similarly, you can expand on this by providing additional examples or further elaborating on the impact of these norms.

Paragraph 3

This paragraph highlights how the silence of women in the face of sexism can perpetuate discrimination. To enhance the paragraph, you can include more sentences to provide evidence or delve deeper into the concept of perpetuation.

Conclusion

The conclusion sentence should restate the thesis using new words and provide a brief summary of the main arguments. It should also explain the significance of the analysis and research to other scholars and society. Additionally, you can mention what readers should take away from the essay.

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