Answer:
I like your essay a lot! Very interesting subject matter. The topic is good, there are just some minor edits. You don't absolutely have to use whatever I say, use whatever you think makes the essay better!
- In paragraph 2 remove the "kind of." I don't think you need it and it's too informal, not formal enough. Unless you want the tone of the essay to be informal.
- I like the MLA formatted quote but also in paragraph 2 when you put your quote in there, take away the comma after 'the author describes their look in further depth by saying,'
- At the end of your quote and in front of the last quotation mark you need a period, like ." The period doesn't go after the MLA format like (Plato 748). It should be "...he formally saw." (Plato 748) Do this with all your quotes please, if you want the correct MLA format!
- Your Bressler page 40 quote needs to be embedded into a sentence. You shouldn't start a sentence with the quote. You could do something like
Bressler wrote, "as formalists, the NEW CRITICS espouse..." Also, at the end of your Bressler quote, you need a space in between (Bressler 40) and the next sentence.
- In paragraph 3 "Without making any interpretations of thinking outside of the box" is too close to the last sentence. I think you need a space there?
- In the final paragraph, I think you should change "That's the main concept here" to "That is the main concept." It makes it more formal I reckon. And then in the very last sentence take out "sort of." Just like the "kind of" at the beginning, you don't need it and it's too informal.
The title should be "Formalism", "Formalism in stories" or something like that. What is your essay about? What's the main idea?
I hope this helped. Your essay is amazing :D