Question

Elect Maxwell Brown for our next mayor. He has a record of public service. For example, by cooperating with others on the city's planning committee, he was able to have streets repaved and the city parks improved. As the boss in the payroll office, he ran a tight ship. By working together, Maxwell Brown will move our town forward!

How can the bold sentence be revised so that it fits the tone of the passage?

A)
He was a responsible leader in the payroll office.


B)
He kept a check on the money in the payroll office.


C)
Nothing got by Maxwell Brown in the payroll office.


D)
Everyone was paid on time when Maxwell Brown signed the checks

Answer 1

I believe the best option to revise the sentence is letter A) He was a responsible leader in the payroll office.

Step-by-step explanation:

This passage targets voters of a town. Its purpose is to convince them to vote for Maxwell Brown. As we can see, the tone is direct and semi-formal. If it were too informal, people would probably dislike the lack of seriousness - especially coming from someone who wishes to govern their town. If it were too formal, its appeal would be lost to most people; the passage would sound pedantic.

Among the options provided in the question, the best one to revise "As the boss in the payroll office, he ran a tight ship" is "He was a responsible leader in the payroll office." It maintains the semi-formal tone, being perfectly understandable to all and still serious enough to not lose credibility. The same cannot be said for the other options. They are all very informal, sounding too childish and humorous for the context in which they would be inserted.