Question

Identify awkward or pretentious diction in the following sentences, and revise each sentence as necessary to improve clarity.

2 Let’s have a discussion of the essay you read for homework.
3 Khaya finally came to the realization that she preferred research to teaching.
4 A key step toward losing weight is to make a reduction in the amount of food you consume.
5 A supercilious manager rarely contributes to a felicitous workplace.
6 Recommendations are being made by the faculty for the honor society.
7 Colin filled out his application to work part-time during the holidays.
8 We should give serious consideration to the possibility of traveling to China this summer.
9 The president has every intention of hearing both viewpoints.
10 Before finalizing the meeting, the chair of the group offered a plethora of ideas.
11 Before Derrell made a serious purchase, such as a car, he made a study of the competition.
12 Many benefits accrue from residing in a heterogeneous community.
13 The press release gave an explanation for the senator’s stance on homeland security.
14 A recalcitrant attitude has resulted from too many of our colleagues becoming mired in quotidian concerns.
15 Maya has a lot of sympathy for students who experience test anxiety.

Answer 1

The improved version of the sentences would be the following one:

2) Let's discuss the essay you read for homework

3) Khaya finally realized that she preferred research to teaching

4) A key step toward losing weight is to reduce the amount of food you consume

5) An arrogant manager rarely contributes to a suitable workplace

6) The faculty are making recommendations for the honor society

7) Colin applied to work part-time during the holidays

8) We should consider the possibility of traveling to China this summer

9) The president intends to hear both viewpoints

10) The chair finished the meeting offering plenty of ideas

11) Before making a serious purchase, such as a car, Derrell studies the competition

12) Living in a diverse community can have many benefits

13) The senator's homeland security policy was explained through a press release

14) Many colleagues have become unruly through being trapped in daily situations

15) Maya simpathizes with students who have test anxiety

Answer 2

2 Let’s have a discussion of the essay you read for homework.
2. Let's discuss the essay you read for homework.

3 Khaya finally came to the realization that she preferred research to teaching.
3. Khaya realized that she preferred researching over teaching.

4 A key step toward losing weight is to make a reduction in the amount of food you consume.
4. Reducing your food consumption is a key step to losing weight.

5 A supercilious manager rarely contributes to a felicitous workplace.
5. Arrogant managers rarely contribute to the suitable workplace.

6 Recommendations are being made by the faculty for the honor society.
6. The faculty are making reccomendations for the honor society.

7 Colin filled out his application to work part-time during the holidays.
7. Colin applied to work part-time during the holidays.

8 We should give serious consideration to the possibility of traveling to China this summer.
8. Before travelling to China this summer, we must consider our possibilities.

9 The president has every intention of hearing both viewpoints.
9. The President intends to hear both viewpoints.

10 Before finalizing the meeting, the chair of the group offered a plethora of ideas.
10. The Chair concluded the meeting by presenting his ideas.

11 Before Derrell made a serious purchase, such as a car, he made a study of the competition.
11. Derrell compiles research of other products before making a serious purchase.

12 Many benefits accrue from residing in a heterogeneous community.
12 Living in a diverse community can have many benefits.

13 The press release gave an explanation for the senator’s stance on homeland security.
13 The senator's homeland security policy was explained through a press release.

14 A recalcitrant attitude has resulted from too many of our colleagues becoming mired in quotidian concerns.
14 Many colleagues have become unruly through being over-absorbed by work issues.

15 Maya has a lot of sympathy for students who experience test anxiety.
15 Maya sympathizes for students experiencing test anxiety.