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Which of these statements describes the problem with including this passage as part of an explanatory essay?

Passage:
The Neolithic Revolution changed everything for humans. Before the N.R., you couldn't even plant food. I know you want to hear more, don't even deny it!

A. The tone is too dull and does not include a hook to keep the reader interested.
B. The tone is too transitional and does not stay focused on one topic.
C. The tone is too informal and does not use appropriate vocabulary.
D. The tone is too objective and does not show the author's opi

User Lukassz
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2 Answers

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I got the tone is too informal and does not use appropriate vocabulary I just took the quiz

User Sajattack
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The correct answer is C. The tone is too informal and does not use appropriate vocabulary.

Step-by-step explanation:

An explanatory essay, like any other type of essay, is a formal academic paper in which the author's purpose is to explain some subject guided by a main claim or thesis statement. Similar to other essays the introduction usually includes a hook which is a statement or set of statements used to engage the reader, the presentation of the topic and the thesis statement. Considering all the paper should follow formal and academic conventions, even though if the hook can include rhetorical questions, anecdotes or similar, it is necessary to use a formal tone and appropriate vocabulary. However, in the case of the passage presented in the question the author uses informal tone such as "I know you want to hear more" or "The Neolithic Revolution changed everything in humans" which are too informal and seem something you might include in a conversation but not in a text, also there is an incorrect use of vocabulary in terms of contractions such as "couldn't" or "don't" that is not appropriate. This means the main problem of this passage is that the tone is too informal and does not use appropriate vocabulary.

User Bruce Stephens
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