Answer:
Alc0h0l: Eyes can't stay still, they can't walk straight, delayed reaction, going from roughly 300ms to 500ms to 1 second.
D r u g $: Mostly the same thing, but no eye jitters. Often times you can smell the alc0h0l. Being very giggly is also a sign of being dr.unk.
I will give more info if needed.