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1 vote
Choose the stylistically superior sentence.

Her short-clipped curls reminded Betty of a poodle.

Her hair was almost white, tightly curled, and very short.

2 Answers

6 votes

I would say the first answer because it uses imagery and sounds more interesting because it compares a girl’s hair to a poodle. It adds style and color to your writing.

User Hector Vido
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4 votes

The first option is without a doubt stylistically superior. The syntax is smoother and tighter. The second description, while matter-of-factly, does nothing for style nor does it tickle the imagination as the first sentence does.

In the first sentence the reader's imagination is summoned up by the metaphoric comparison of her hair to that a of a poodle, an endearing type of dog known by many readers so the image or the metaphor is quite efficacious at portraying 'her hair'.

The second depiction reads like something you would read off of a coroner's report while describing a cadaver.

Of course, stylistic matters are highly subjective but anyone who writes for a living would definitely choose option 1 over option 2.

User AJFarkas
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6.4k points