Question

SOMEONE PLEASEE HELPPP you need to explain why the claim support etc is wrong about this paragraph

I think that advertising to children is necessary. How else will we know what we can buy?

I think that children are not aware of the products that are available. Most children don’t own cars and can’t drive to stores to look around. The only way we know what we can buy is by seeing advertisements on TV. My friend really likes advertisements, too.

He said, "How will we know what to buy if we don’t see advertisements?"

Seriously, children are consumers, too. We know what we like and we ask our parents to buy these products for us. I know that I like certain cereals, but how would I know that if I did not see advertisements?

I love those commercials! Kids are people, too.


Why is the argument ineffective? In a paragraph of 7–10 complete sentences, explain why the following parts of the argument are ineffective, and how they can be improved:

Claim
Support
Conclusion Clincher
Point of View
Transitions

Answer 1

Should companies be allowed to advertise to children?

I think that advertising to children is necessary. How else will we know what we can buy?

I think that children are not aware of the products that are available. Most children don’t own cars and can’t drive to stores to look around. The only way we know what we can buy is by seeing advertisements on TV. My friend really likes advertisements, too.

He said, "How will we know what to buy if we don’t see advertisements?"

Seriously, children are consumers, too. We know what we like and we ask our parents to buy these products for us. I know that I like certain cereals, but how would I know that if I did not see advertisements?

I love those commercials! Kids are people, too.

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The argument is ineffective because this paragraph is heavily influenced by the author's opinion. The support of information to back up the claim is weak, because it is based on opinion as well. Stating "The only way we know what we can buy is by seeing advertisements on TV. My friend really likes advertisements, too." is only telling me your opinion as well as what your friend is interested in, not what people need. There is also no factual information from other sources that the reader can agree with. If you said www.source.com stated 89.99% of kids find advertising appealing to the eye, then the reader would most likely agree with your claim, however, you just said an opinion. The conclusion clincher is defective and the author doesn't restate his claim clearly, "I know that I like certain cereals, but how would I know that if I did not see advertisements? I love those commercials! Kids are people, too.". Many people would not agree with this, all you're saying is, people won't know what they like without advertisements. You're telling us we can't just go to the store, look at the box and find it interesting, and stating "kids are people too!" doesn't help your claim at all, that doesn't even back up your information. Now you're just bringing up something different.The overall argument needs a big improvement and needs to provoke people by using actual information and facts instead of the author's own thoughts and opinions.

Step-by-step explanation:

I hope this helps out.

Answer 2

The argument is ineffective and can be improved significantly. First of all, he writes the claim in the first person. A formal persuasive essay should be in the form of third person. The author can improve his support by using less opinions and back-up his thesis with facts and evidence and does not take a strong stance on the conclusion clincher. The author also does not efficiently connect his essay. There is no cohesion and his diction is weak. He can improve it by using stronger vocabulary.