Final answer:
The essay can be improved by providing detailed evidence of India's impact compared to Mesopotamia and Egypt, who are historically recognized as major influences on Western Civilization.
Step-by-step explanation:
In the essay asserting that India has had the greatest impact on the Western world among ancient civilizations, several key points about India's influence are mentioned. However, the essay could be improved by elaborating on these points with more detailed evidence and by comparing them with the significant contributions from Mesopotamia, Egypt, and other ancient civilizations. To strengthen the argument, one should consider the historical facts that the cradle of Western Civilization was in Mesopotamia and Egypt. These regions contributed immensely with technologies, scientific inquiry, and the emergence of the major religions like Judaism, Christianity, and Islam. Additionally, Egyptian culture influenced Greek and Roman cultures, which in turn shaped the Western tradition. Mesopotamia is recognized as the birthplace of civilization with advancements in agriculture, mathematics, astronomy, and engineering. Therefore, to bolster the argument, one could include how Indian contributions have been integrated into Western society and compare their longevity and influence to those of Mesopotamia and Egypt.