It is common for family members to want to protect their loved ones from bad news, but this is not always what the patient himself would want. It would be reasonable to tell Jose's brother that withholding information can be very bad because it creates a climate of dishonesty between the patient and family and medical caregivers; also, that the only way for Jose to have a voice in the decision making is for him to understand the medical situation. Ask Jose how he wants to handle the information in front of the rest of the family, and allow for some family discussion time for this matter.
In some cultures it is considered dangerous to talk about prognoses and to name illnesses (e.g., the Navajo). If you suspect a cultural issue it is better to find someone who knows how to handle the issue in a culturally sensitive way than to assume that you should simply refrain from providing medical information. For many invasive medical interventions which require a patient to critically weigh burdens and benefits, a patient will need to have some direct knowledge of their disease in Western terms in order to consider treatment options.
You are a 25-year-old female medical student doing a rotation in an HIV clinic. Sara is a 30-year-old woman with advanced HIV who dropped out of college after she found that she contracted HIV from her husband, who has hemophilia. In talking to Sara, it turns out you share a number of things--you are from the same part of Montana originally, also have young children, and like to cook. Later in the visit, when you suggest that she will need some blood tests, she gets very angry and says, "What would you know about this?"
What happened?
Although the protocol for breaking bad news is helpful, it doesn't cover everything. There are instances when you may provoke a reaction from a patient because you remind them of someone else--or, as in this case, themselves. In these instances it can be helpful to step back, get another perspective (perhaps from someone in clinic who has known Sara), and try not to take this reaction too personally--even though it is likely that Sara will know how to really bother you.
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