i think your short essay is really good! when ur having trouble with transition words, for me searching up transition words helps me and i learn to use them for my classes daily so i can develop my skills :D but i rewrote ur essay a little so you can use it or take some things away from it if you’d like!!!!
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My bedroom is where I feel most at ease and show who I am.
I can truly be myself here and do whatever I want. I stay in my room every morning and return home to it. Because it is my own space, I feel free in it. My brothers play music or yell at each other every few minutes, making my home a constant state of chaos. This makes my room the only place in the house where I can unwind without worrying about anything else, and the only place where I can clear my mind.
My bedroom is medium-sized. Although I wouldn't call it beautiful or amazing, it is a comfortable spot for me to be when I want to be by myself. It's the place that always lifts my spirits when I'm down as well as the place I go to when I need a safe space.
I admire my room a lot because I can go to my bedroom when I need to study for tests or submit an assignment before midnight for school. My room is very big, quiet, relaxing, and cozy. Locking my door and telling my family not to disturb me when I need privacy, makes me feel better and it demonstrates the sheltered feeling my room emits to me considering I can retreat to my private bedroom to unwind and unwind.
I feel secure in my bedroom because I can be who I am and no one can stop me from doing anything. You can tell that love is present in my room, which is like that. It is peaceful and full of fun. I really appreciate having it because it is my favorite place.