Question

Hello ppl, I need to wright a naritive for my class and i wanted to share the start of it with u. Tell me what u think. If u think anything needs changing please tell me. Enjoy

Far far away lay a small farm with all the animals you would expect, horses, cows, dogs and cats. Little Mary Johnson and her brother were wandering around the old run-down house in which they lived. Mary was following her brother to the old Oak tree at the top of Cherry Hill where he said he saw a bee hive. The tiny hill overlooked the little graveyard in town. Mary was terribly scared of the small patch of land by the old church. They reached the top of the hill where Mary could hear a soft buzzing
She saw the small bee hive at the top of the tree. She knew why her brother brought her here at the top of the small hill. See, her brother's class where learning about honey bees, and for most of summer break he had been leading her to where he had found the small buzzing insects.

Answer 1

Here, i fixed your grammar and changed some words. If you'd like, i can help you write it! Im working on a novel or two.

"Far, far away lay a small farm with all the animals you would expect, horses, cows, dogs, and cats. Little Mary Johnson and her brother were wandering around the old run-down house in which they lived. Mary was following her brother. They went to the old Oak tree, exactly where he had seen the beehive. The tiny hill overlooked the little graveyard in town. Mary was scared of the small patch of land by the old church. They reached the top of the hill where Mary could hear a soft humming noise from inside.

She saw the small beehive at the top of the tree. She knew why her brother brought her here at the top of the small hill. See, her brother's class was learning about honey bees, and for most of the summer break, he had been leading her to where he had found the small buzzing, bright yellow but pitch black striped insects."